Ex Post Facto

Cabbages and Kings

2009-02-06T11:10:00.002-05:00

My word, but it's been a long time.

Of course, there are many reasons why...dissertation, and the fact that I'd rather be on the couch with my boyfriend in the evenings than at the computer trying to think up useless blog topics not least among them.

So, why am I updating now? Well, for one thing I'm on a new schedule that makes my mornings a bit weird. The classes I teach are all in the afternoon, which makes my day a bit weird. Basically, I get up, work on stuff until about noon, have lunch, head to school, teach, and then I'm back home by 3:30. Unfortunately, at that point, I'm really not in the mood to go back to working on dissertation stuff. Consequently, my work time gets slightly cut down. So I'm blogging now because I just finished one project for the day, but I don't have enough time to start the next one before I have to shower, lunch, and head out the door. The second reason is that, well, I haven't updated in a while and I'm bored. One can only check Google Reader so often for updates, people.

So what's new since the summer? I still haven't graduated for one. That, however, is coming shortly...most likely in March or early April. The boyfriend is going to be an uncle for the second time in the next month or so, so we're planning a trip to the mid-west in the near future. Christmas was lovely, if a bit overextended. We have a new president! I watched the inauguration, and I unexpectedly cried as soon as Chief Justice Roberts said, "Congratulations, Mr. President." Does it seem to anyone else that there's a new bounce in everyone's step?

I'm sure there's lots more, but I'm blanking out. I'm about to turn 30, you know. Since senility is apparently setting in early, consider yourselves updated, because I doubt it will get better.

Happy belated new year, and here's to blogging more regularly in the future.

Culture Corner: Le déjeuner sur l'herbe

2008-06-03T12:04:00.005-04:00

Édouard Manet, Luncheon on the Grass, 1863

This piece, by one of the great masters of the later nineteenth century, is one of the most visually arresting pieces I can think of. Not only is it interestingly executed, but the subject matter leaves many questions and hints to numerous possible interpretations.

My favorite way of thinking of this painting is to conceive of it as a photograph in oil paint. The latter half of the nineteenth century saw something of a revolution in the way that images are created. Some of it stemmed from the Realist movement, in which artists sought to eschew previous subjects -- gods, classical antiquity, religious themes, historic events, monarchs -- to focus on the reality of everyday life. The most noted Realist is Gustave Courbet, whose the The Stonebreakers is considered an exemplar of the genre. In this enormous canvas, the dimensions of which were usually only reserved for grand, epic subjects, Courbet painted two men breaking rocks with hammers. Not exactly exciting stuff, but it served something of a political purpose by rhetorically asking, "Why do we glorify men who have achieved greatness only through birth, when there are everyday heroes like these laborers?" Along with Realism, some of the image revolution came from the invention of the camera. With this contraption, "reality" no longer had to be filtered through the eye, the mind, and the hand of the artist; rather, people could get a firsthand account of events as they happened. Such a novel approach created something of a vogue for "real life" that both fueled the Realist painters and the Impressionists as well as much of what constituted urban life in the latter nineteenth century (where going to the city morgue was considered a fun family outing).

Luncheon on the Grass stylistically takes something from these parallel developments. For one, the lighting is completely strange. As opposed to a natural light, which one would get from lunching in the park, the characters appear brightly lit as if from an artificial source beyond our view. Notice, the characters do not cast shadows, nor are there really any shadows in the picture at all. Likewise, the positions of the characters are strange. They seem posed and artificial -- not like a group sharing a picnic at all, but more like mannequins holding the places where actual people should be. The overall effect is to give something of a muddled impression of the "reality" of the scene. Is it staged? Does the photographer really represent life as it is, or does the camera, in fact, lie depending on the operator?

Of course, the most noticeable feature of the painting has nothing to do with lighting or posing, but rather the totally nude woman sitting front and center. Some people have pointed to this as being a possible reference to the rampant prostitution that existed in many Parisian parks in this period. This seems a little too simplistic to me, though. I mean, it is broad daylight, and the rest of the scene hardly suggests "prostitution." Indeed, there is nothing sensual about this painting at all. Notice that the two men do not pay any attention to the woman sitting stark naked in front of them (nor to the semi-clad woman in the water behind them). Even the food, which in many instances represents sensuality, is something of an afterthought. It is not being consumed, it merely lay tossed aside, a remnant of an afternoon's activities. Perhaps the state of disarray of the food suggests a tryst that has already happened, but again the rest of the scene does not suggest this -- the men are fully clothed, the woman appears bored, and there is nothing even remotely sexy about the scene.

I don't think this painting is about sex in the conventional way. I think it is meant to suggest something about Victorian models of respectability. The nude woman is obviously a breach of bourgeois morality in her stark nudity; the men completely ignoring her upholds the idea of masculine restraint. Perhaps Manet is questioning a social structure that tells men to uphold an impossible ideal, such that they ignore a completely beautiful naked woman for the sake of each others' company. In this, perhaps Manet is suggesting something of a homosocial/homosexual undertone -- that bourgeois morality is, in fact, dandifying and emasculating the true nature of male sociability.

Anyway, the overall effect is somewhat disconcerting, and that's what draws me to it. Any art that raises more questions than it gives is good art in my book.

Culture Corner: Les Bergers d'Arcadie

2008-05-28T12:47:00.005-04:00

Nicolas Poussin, The Shepherds of Arcadia, 1638

This work by Nicolas Poussin has aroused some controversy of late because of some completely irrational conspiracy theories concerning the bloodline of Christ and other such conspiratorial gibberish. It seems that ever since The DaVinci Code, people have been obsessed with historical mysteries and are convinced that there's a worldwide conspiracy to keep these things hidden. Can't people just accept that there are some things that have been lost to time and leave it at that? It makes things so much more fun than having all the answers, doesn't it?

Anyhow, it seems that all of this Priory of Sion business has come about because of some very tortured interpretations of this work, mainly centering around the inscription on the tomb in the painting: "Et in Arcadia ego." Traditionally, this phrase has been translated as "Even in Arcadia, I exist," with the intended inference being that Death is the speaker. Arcadia is a mythological reference that is meant to inspire pastoral beauty and utopianism; thus, if the speaker is Death, the phrase points out that even in paradise, mortality will take its toll. The conspiracy nuts claim that the phrase is an anagram that points to the bloodline of Jesus. That only makes sense with some very twisted logic. And 'shrooms.

The painting itself is an interesting commentary on the phrase. The shepherds are clearly meant to invoke the bucolic paradise that Arcadia references; the contrast of the images of utopia with the cold stone tomb points to the inevitability of death. The actions of the shepherds, however, comment on the idea of mortality and the possibility that it may be overcome. If you look closely, the kneeling shepherd in front of the tomb has a shadow that is cast over the stony façade, a common artistic trope that is meant to evoke the idea of mortality. His companion to the right, however, is tracing the shadow with his finger. Possibly, this is a reference to the creation of art. To do so on the wall of the tomb is a symbol of the artist's triumph over death. For these shepherds, even if the kneeling figure were to die, his image would be left behind in a grab at immortality; thus, the overall impression is that the artist is able to conquer death through the immortalization of images, people, and events. So, while death may exist even in Arcadia, no one need be forgotten when they are gone.

Interestingly, this painting is a reworking of an earlier painting by the same painter. In The Shepherds of Arcadia from 1627, Poussin makes the point all the more clearly. In this version, there is a skull atop the tomb, clearly pointing to Death as the speaker of the infamous line. The figures in the painting are much more Baroque in their execution, with the strong use of shading, emotion, and visual motion to evoke a more powerful image. The later representation is more in the classical style with very staid, emotionless figures, geometrical composition, and austerity of execution. While the Baroque era was known for its extravagance and its drama (being the favored style of absolutist rulers like the Popes or Louis XIV of France), perhaps Poussin thought that the statement he was trying to make was too heavy for such a lighthearted, almost Rococo style.

In any event, the mysterious painting can still inspire thought without being tied to the lunatic fringe of conspiracy theorists, and its cold, detached presentation can still give it the air of creepiness that, perhaps, many people find titillating. I certainly don't begrudge anyone their religious faith, and if it makes them happy to continually search for evidence of Christ, then certainly that is their right. By leaving the possibility of physical evidence of Jesus out of it, though, doesn't it make the painting -- and Christianity -- more inspiring?

He said WHAT?

2007-12-03T15:12:00.002-05:00

These, to my mind, are the ten greatest quotes of 19th- and 20th-century American history. They have been chosen for their historical significance, their eloquence, their wit, or their cattiness. They are in no particular order. They are not chosen on the basis of ideology or partisanship. They are simply the ones that I enjoy the most. I give you:

THE TEN GREATEST QUOTES OF 19th and 20TH-CENTURY AMERICA

1. Context: United States UN Ambassador Adlai Stevenson addresses Soviet Ambassador Valerian Zorin (who has one of the BEST names of all time), questioning Zorin about his country's placing of missiles in Cuba during the Cuban Missile Crisis of 1961. Stevenson asked if Zorin's country was installing missiles, to which he abruptly added this gem,

"Don't wait for the translation, answer 'yes' or 'no'!"

Sock it to 'em, egghead.

2. Context: The 1988 Vice Presidential debate between Sen. Dan Quayle (Republican running mate of George H. W. Bush) and Sen. Lloyd Bentsen (Democratic running mate of Michael Dukakis). The campaign highlighted Quayle's relatively short time in the Senate as a marker of his inexperience, should he ever be elevated to the presidency. In rebuttal, Quayle often compared himself to John F. Kennedy by saying that Kennedy had no more experience than he had when Kennedy sought the presidency, to which Bentsen replied,

"Senator, I served with Jack Kennedy; I knew Jack Kennedy; Jack Kennedy was a friend of mine. Senator, you're no Jack Kennedy."

Meow, baby.

3. Context: The 1963 March on Washington for Jobs and Freedom, at which Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., adressed the crowd from the Lincoln Memorial in Washington, D.C. and gave his famous "I Have a Dream" speech. This is classic, and should be read in its entirety by ALL Americans.

"I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: 'We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal.'"

Obviously.

4. Context: In 1954, during the Army-McCarthy hearings in which Sen. Joseph McCarthy was attempting to weed out communists from the Army. During some aggressive questioning from the Army's lawyer, Joseph Welch, McCarthy fired back that Welch should be more concerned with tending to his own organizations. He specifically referenced an attorney from Welch's Boston law office, Fred Fisher, who had come under suspicion because of his involvement with the National Lawyers' Guild, an organization suspected of being a communist front. In a pre-trial agreement McCarthy and Welch had agreed not to bring Fisher up because the matter was already under investigation. When McCarthy violated this agreement in mentioning Fisher, Welch fired back with this classic retort.

"Let us not assassinate this lad further, Senator... You've done enough. Have you no sense of decency, sir, at long last? Have you left no sense of decency?"

I use this one myself sometimes. The reference usually gets lost on most people.

5. Context: The Minnesota State Fair in 1901, at which Vice President Theodore Roosevelt articulated what's known as "Big Stick Diplomacy" in which the United States had the right to not only oppose European intervention in the Western hemisphere, but also to use forceful means to head it off. Examples are mostly from United States involvement in Latin America and the Caribbean.

"Speak softly and carry a big stick."

Weirdly, President McKinley would be assassinated twelve days later, giving Roosevelt the chance to implement his policy as 26th President of the United States.

6. Context: December 8, 1941, the day after the Empire of Japan bombed the US Naval installation at Pearl Harbor, Hawaii. President Franklin Roosevelt stood before the assembled Congress to ask for a declaration of war.

"Yesterday, December 7, 1941 -- a date which will live in infamy -- the United States of America was suddenly and deliberately attacked by naval and air forces of the Empire of Japan."

7. Context: The 1832 Supreme Court case Worcester v. Georgia. At the time, Georgia required any white person living in Native American territory to be licensed by the state. Several missionaries refused to obtain the license on the grounds that the state of Georgia had no right to enforce laws on sovereign Indian nations. They contested the law all the way to the Supreme Court. In a surprise decision, the Court (under the stewardship of Chief Justice John Marshall) struck down the Georgia law, effectively acknowledging the existence of sovereign Indian communities within the United States. President Andrew Jackson, who nearly always took an unfavorable view towards Native Americans, and is credited with something of a Native American holocaust with his Indian removal policies, expressed his reaction to the decision.

"John Marshall has made his decision; now let him enforce it!"

8. Context: At the height of the Civil War, Abraham Lincoln traveled to Gettysburg, Pennsylvania several months after the Union armies decisively defeated the Confederacy in the Battle of Gettysburg. To commemorate the battle, and those lost in it, Lincoln gave the now-famous Gettysburg Address, which many a grade-schooler ever since has been obliged to memorize.

"Four score and seven years ago, our fathers brought forth on this continent a new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal."

9. Context: The 1925 Scopes trial, in which Tennessee schoolteacher Thomas Scopes was brought to court for teaching the theory of evolution in defiance of state laws the prohibited the teaching of any theory that denied the story of divine creation presented in the Bible. In a famous turn of events, the defense attorney, Clarence Darrow, called for an expert on the Bible, a call that was readily answered by the prosecuting attorney and influential politician, William Jennings Bryan. During the questioning, Darrow attempted to show that belief in the historicity of the Bible was unreasonable and should not be taught as science.

"You insult every man of science and learning in the world because he does not believe in your fool religion. [...] We have the purpose of preventing bigots and ignoramuses from controlling the education of the United States."

10. Context: The 1949 Supreme Court case Terminiello v. Chicago, in which a priest had been convicted under a Chicago ordinance for breach of peace. Terminiello was convicted of breaching the peace at a rally where his anti-Semitic, pro-Nazi ranting incited quite a large protest (understandably). Terminiello appealed, and on review Justice William Douglas wrote the majority opinion overturning Terminiello's conviction and striking down the city ordinance as unconstitutional. According to Douglas, no matter how inflamatory, free speech must be protected:

"The choice is not between order and liberty. It is between liberty with order and anarchy without either. There is danger that, if the court does not temper is doctrinaire logic with a little practical wisdom, it will convert the constitutional Bill of Rights into a suicide pact."

And there you have it, folks!

Take THAT dissertation committee!

2007-08-07T11:25:00.000-04:00

I actually just wrote the following sentence in my dissertation:

In the case of a man who claimed he was anally raped by a dog, Lacassagne’s extensive analysis of the shape and size of a dog’s penis, the methods through which one can arouse a dog’s desire, and the mechanics involved in the actual perpetration of the canine “pederasty” served only to elucidate the grotesque details for the voyeuristic reader.

I am the most awesome intellectual. EVAR.

Edited to add: I just realized that posting that will probably get me all kinds of hits from people searching for "anal rape" and "dogs" together. I love the internet.

"Happy, happy birthday baby..."

2007-07-25T12:12:00.001-04:00

Lots of activity in the past couple of days, kids.

This weekend was Bryan's birthday, so we went to New York City to celebrate. We spent the weekend hanging out with one of my best friends from high school, and she dutifully took us out-of-towners where we wanted to go. But, first things first.

We got there after a grueling 6 hours in traffic and parked the car near my friend's Brooklyn apartment before taking the subway into the city. Of course, we had to stop at the Apple Store on 5th Ave., as it's kind of a holy place for Bryan. Also, it's right next to F.A.O. Schwarz, so we could pick up some toys for the new nephew and the soon-to-be-daughter of one of Bryan's good friends.

After dinner, we met up with my friend at her workplace. She took us to the roof of her building in Herald Square (which, as a matter of fact, is where the above picture came from). After she got off of work around midnight, we went to Lincoln Center to see this art installation. The theory behind it is cool. The artist filmed dancers performing, but slowed the frame rate way down so it looks like they're floating in mid-air and holding leg extensions for eons. It was very cool, and quite relaxing to watch as we lay on the cement of the plaza.

On Saturday, we spent the whole day at Coney Island for the Siren Music Festival. I had never been to Coney Island before, and all the impressions I get of it from the media are of a drug-ridden former paradise. It was actually kind of charming in certain respects, although it was VERY crowded and VERY hot, with no shade. Being the delicate flower that I am, I was slathered in sunscreen and sought shade at every possible opportunity. The highlight of Coney Island was riding the Cyclone roller coaster. It was fun, I guess. If you like being beaten to a bloody pulp. The ride was so rough, Bryan has bruises all over his body (I guess he's the delicate flower in that scenario). Later that night, some other friends of mine came in for a birthday dinner at the Park Slope Alehouse.

Sunday we left Brooklyn after eating a couple of burritos the size of our heads, and we had dinner with my family in Connecticut at one of the best seafood restaurants in the state before heading home. All in all, it was a good weekend, and Bryan enjoyed his birthday which is all I really cared about in the first place.

Next week, we're off to Indiana to visit the new nephew and experience the heartland, so I'm looking forward to a week of chain restaurants and fast food joints.

If you can't say anything nice...

2007-07-23T16:01:00.000-04:00

This meme looks really interesting, and is very different from a lot of the memes out there. I thought I'd give it a try.

List ten things you want to say to 10 people you know, but never will for whatever reason. Don't say who they are. Use each person only once and only use one sentence.

1. You are quick to point out the things you see as faults in others, but you are absolutely incapable of seeing those exact same traits in yourself.
2. I am severely disappointed that you didn't even call me on my birthday.
3. You used our friendship to manipulate me because you knew you could.
4. You intimidate me as much as you inspire me.
5. I will never forgive you for what you did to me.
6. I'm capable of far more than you think I am, but you never give me the chance.
7. Our friendship is one of the things that I cherish most in my life.
8. Were you to ever not be in my life, I would experience the biggest, deepest, saddest sense of loss I have ever known.
9. I'm almost a Ph.D., and you sell shoes for living, and I don't feel at all badly that I'm gloating about that.
10. I hate your significant other.

I wanted to try out Blogger's picture posting capability.

2007-07-19T16:27:00.001-04:00

Just a silly picture of me singing really bad opera in front of the Opéra Garnier in Paris.

It's that kind of day.

"I know I must keep travelin' till my road comes to an end..."

2007-07-03T09:47:00.000-04:00

OK, Will. Ha ha. Here's another post -- this year, yet -- just for you, Mr. Smarty Pants. And, for the record, yes, the dead bird is off of my car. That car, as a matter of fact, is now completely defunct. Head gasket blown, wheel baring rapidly going down the tubes, brakes no longer functioning. It sits in the driveway like a beached whale, gathering pollen dust and bird poo. Pretty soon I'll have to get some cinder blocks and turn it into a planter or something for the front yard. But that $500 air conditioning I paid for last summer works like a champ. If there was a patron saint for automobiles, I'd kick him or her in his or her respective naughties.

Aside from the car, life continues on. I've been granted a research fellowship for the summer, so I spend most days confined in my apartment reading through dusty tomes (or photocopies of dusty tomes) and writing my magnum opus. It's currently on page 30 or so. I must say, after 6 years of working toward this moment, I thought that the writing process would be easier. I mean I have all of my arguments, tons of notes, and a skeletal outline. Alas, no -- not so easy. It is the most soul-sucking endeavor I've yet encountered in grad school, and as many of you know, grad school has no dearth of soul-suckage.

Bryan continues at his job, although hopefully not much longer, and he's eagerly anticipating meeting his new nephew when we head to Indianapolis at the end of July. My mom knitted him a new baby blanket, which is really cute, and we're both looking forward to giving it to the blessed child when we see him. As well as meeting the little'un, it will be my first time meeting Bryan's brother which should be interesting. I only get Bryan's view of his brother most of the time, so I'll be keen to know if he lives up to his reputation.

Bryan and I have a relatively new addition to the family, our beloved Oscar. He has several annoying habits, but when he's not currently engaged in yowling, scratching, or tearing about the house, he's darned cute. Bryan continues to try to "train" him. Mostly, it's kind of like watching an episode of ALF. The furry being does something annoying and mildly destructive; we berate him for all of thirty seconds; he gives us the googly eyes; we all have a hearty laugh and snuggle on the couch.

My best friend got married this weekend. The wedding was beautiful, she was beautiful -- the whole thing was beautiful (or, à la Cabaret, "Bee-YOO-tee-ful!"). I'm happy for her, if I'm a bit sad for me. We'll never hang out, just the two of us, like we used to, or do any of the impulsive things we were fond of in our earlier years. No matter how much I look to the future, when the future arrives, there's always part of me that wants to maintain just a little bit of the past. I guess that's what photo albums are for.

And there it is folks. The update. Hopefully to be followed by more, although probably not on anything resembling a normal schedule. Um, yeah. Tally-ho!

Transit umbra, lux permanet.

2007-05-03T11:10:00.000-04:00

Well, well, well.

Where have I been, you may ask? Paris. Houston. Boston. School. Home. Work. Everywhere and nowhere.

Where am I going? Too soon to tell. In some senses I'm sliding in to home base; in others, I've yet to step up to the plate.

Keep an eye on this space in the future. I'm coming back.

You ain't seen the last of me.

File Under: "EEEEEEEEW!"

2006-06-16T13:57:00.000-04:00

There is a dead baby bird on the windshield of my car.

Enough said.

Updates and a Five

2006-06-02T10:51:00.000-04:00

Hello once again, all. Some quick updates:

-This past Saturday was the 6 month-iversary of Bryan's and my relationship! Being the incredibly poor grad student that I am, I planned an inexpensive, yet enjoyable afternoon. I cooked lemon chicken and Montauk seafood salad (thanks, Ina Garten!), and planned a road trip to the Webb Memorial Park in Weymouth. Unfortunately, on the way we got lost and ended up at Nantasket instead. It's all good, though...Nantasket turned out to be nicer than the Webb Memorial Park, which we visited on our way back to Boston. And then, we sealed the afternoon with a viewing of the new X-Men movie. So, although I've said it to him already in person, here it is for the fans, if a little late: Happy anniversary, Bryan. I love you very much.

-As part of our 6-month extravaganza, we had "the discussion," and it's official: we'll be moving in together in the fall! It's a big step, and it's a little scary, but I also think it'll be really great. I have visions of keeping the home fires burning for my man, as he swaggers in from a long day at the office to see dinner prepared, on the table, and his lovely boyfriend in a completely retro apron and a big grin -- and nothing else. So, the apartment hunt begins!

And now, the Friday Five: Love Songs
1. "Dream a Little Dream of Me" - Mama Cass: I *adore* this song. It's such a simple melody, and yet it's so plaintively expressed in Mama Cass' remarkable voice. And the message, however plain, is very powerful: the stars may fade, but I will linger on in your dreams. *Sigh.*
2. "Unchained Melody" - Righteous Brothers: A classic. When Bobby Hetfield hits those high notes toward the end, you can feel the yearning in his voice...he really *does* NEED your love.
3. "The Way You Look Tonight" by anyone. This song is absolutely perfect. To anyone who doesn't know it: Listen to it, or be sentenced to cretinhood for all eternity.
4. "Every Breath You Take" - The Police. Yes, I know it's creepy, but that's what makes it great. Sometimes, love is creepy.
5. "Open Arms" - Journey. This one is for the '80s hair band crowd. Steve Perry has a great voice, and this song uses it to its full potential. Plus, I have very fond memories of dancing with girls (eek!) at the yearly Band Banquet in high school. Yes, I am that much of a dork.

Happy weekend everyone!

An Adult Survey

2006-05-24T11:22:00.000-04:00

So I found this at Will's site, and since my love for memes has no bounds, I thought it would make an interesting blog post. Here goes...

1. Ever been to a male strip club? Not once.
2. Ever been to a female strip club? Exactly once. I used to have a friend in college who worked at the Glass Slipper as "Vixen." I should have had her teach me a thing or two, because damn that was impressive.
3. Ever been to a bar? THOUSANDS of times. Well, maybe not thousands. But lots.
4. Ever been kicked out of a bar or a club? Do you not see the halo above my head?
5. Ever been so drunk you had to be carried out? From a bar? No.
6. Ever been so drunk you blacked out? Passed out, yes. Blacked out, no.
7. Kissed someone of the same sex (no relatives)? That is *so* against God's plan.
8. Thrown up from drinking too much? A couple of times, yeah. Not my finest moments, but what I remember of the occasions that brought on the hurling tells me I had a damned good time.
9. Had sex with more than one person in a 24 hour period? Oh lord no.
10. Had sex in a car? I've always wanted to try it!
11. Had sex in a park? Nope.
12. Had sex in a movie theater? Nope.
13. Had sex in a bathroom? Nope.
14. Had sex in a school? Nope.
15. Have you ever been in an "adult" store? Every one in the New England area, it seems.
16. Have you ever purchased items from an adult store? Yes indeed.
17. Have you spent over $100.00 in one visit to the adult store? Not that I can recall. I can rarely bring myself to spend $100 at one time in ANY store.
18. Is there someone you wished you never had sex with? Oh my yes. One guy, about 7 years ago. I was totally duped by his apparent charm and reasonable good looks. And the fact that I was a horny teenager. Ah, youthful indiscretions.
19. Is there someone you wished you would have had sex with? Hmmm. At the time I was pining for them, yes, but in retrospect I'm SOOO glad that didn't happen.
20. How many partners have you had? 4, but that doesn't include the numerous people I only *made out* with.
21. Have you ever received oral sex? Yes.
22. Have you ever given oral sex? Yes.
23. Have you ever had a threesome? I feel like that's one more penis than I can handle at a time.
24. Are your breasts real? I'm actually a fem-bot. I can shoot bullets from my nipples.
25. Have you ever used viagra (or anything like it)? Haven't needed it so far.
26. Would you rather give or receive oral sex? Hmmm. I think I prefer giving, but both are pleasurable for different reasons.
27. Have you ever kissed a stranger? Several.
28. How old were you when you first had sex? 18. We were both freshmen in college.
29. Have you ever had a one night stand? Nope.
30. Were you honest in this survey? To the letter.

"Summertime, and the livin' is easy..."

2006-05-23T12:39:00.000-04:00

Well, summer vacation is finally upon us. As such, it is time for a few summer resolutions:

1. Lose weight. This is a recurring theme with me. It seems every winter I go through the process of putting on insulatory weight only to cry in horror as I stare at my flab in the mirror wearing my oh-so-cute, but now oh-so-tight summer outfits. So, as part of my summer regimen I am going on a diet, and I am going to attempt to take up jogging. We'll see how well this works. Last time I tried jogging, I went exactly once and almost collapsed into a ragged panting heap on the side of the road. Most decidedly not fabulous.

2. Dissertation research. There has to be a lot of it. This is my time to do one big push to get the majority of it done and move on to some hardcore writing. I've done bits and pieces here and there -- conferences, publications, etc. -- but I'm actually going to try to attempt a whole chapter by the end of the summer. Ay!

3. Save money. I have not been the best about this, mostly because I don't make enough to have the luxury of putting some away for a rainy day. And I know that Bryan and I like to live in a certain style. But profligacy does not become me when, at the end of the month, I'm eating six-month-old ramen noodles 3 meals a day.

4. Read at least one non-dissertation book a month. I have to be reminded, occasionally, why I like reading -- especially when all I'm usually reading are dry academic texts that I have to analyze in a thoughtful manner. Outside reading helps take away those blues.

5. My word, some chick just walked by wearing a hideous skirt. Someone lied to her.

6. Generally, be fabulous at any and all occasions.

OK, that's it. I certainly have my work cut out for me.

The Friday Five: Musicals

2006-05-12T10:30:00.000-04:00

Today's topic? The five best musicals of all time according to me!

1. Sweeney Todd, The Demon Barber of Fleet Street: This 1979 gem is my absolute favorite musical. I am an unabashed Stephen Sondheim fan (hell, what queer isn't?), but I think this one towers above his other works. The way he skillfully wove musical themes throughout the epic "musical thriller" is breathtaking, as well as the fact that he took a very big risk with this one and it worked spectacularly. Few musicals with such dark themes survive (see the ill-fated Carrie and Side Show), but this one -- about a macabre barber who slakes his thirst for revenge by slitting the throats of his customers, while his adoring neighbor Mrs. Lovett makes the bodies into meat pies -- was extremely successful thanks to the charismatic performances of Len Cariou and Angela Lansbury. Notable number: "A Little Priest."
2. Cabaret: This one, which debuted in 1966 and has spawned several revivals and an Oscar-winning film starring Liza Minnelli (GASP!), is notable not only for its noble theatrical lineage (based on Christopher Isherwood's Berlin Stories and the John van Druten play I Am a Camera), but also for the fantastic score filled with show-stopping numbers by John Kander and Fred Ebb. Set in 1930s Berlin just before the rise of the Nazi party, this show captures the value-less cultural mentality of the Weimar Republic through cabaret songs commenting on the action of the show -- most of which are performed by a devilish Master of Ceremonies (classically performed by Joel Grey, and recently wickedly revived by Alan Cumming). Notable number: "Cabaret." (Ah...Liza.)
3. A Chorus Line: This innovative 1975 show with score by Marvin Hamlisch is notable for its breakdown of standard musical conventions. The play's action takes us behind the scenes to see the casting of a musical chorus line, a musical that we ironically don't get to see. In the witnessing of the casting process we get to see the lives, loves, and heartbreaks of the dancers being auditioned, giving us a sense of the humanity that exists behind the bright lights of the Broadway stage. Notable number: "One."
4. West Side Story: This 1957 musical "update" of Shakespeare's Romeo & Juliet with score by Leonard Bernstein is pure magic because it skillfully blends the operatic composition that Bernstein is known for with a more populist sensibility. Plus, singing "I Feel Pretty" in front of your mirror is just big damn fun. Notable number: Too many to mention! "Tonight"; "Somewhere"; "America"; "Cool."
5. Les Misérables: This 1987 piece with score by Alain Boublil and Claude-Michel Schonberg epitomizes the epic stories that are common to 1980s musicals and also helped to sustain the '80s obsession with spectacle -- from The Phantom of the Opera's re-creation of the Opéra Garnier in Paris to the helicopter descending on the roof of the American Embassy in Miss Saigon. What's excellent about "Les Miz" in particular is that it has a lot of that Broadway flash and flambuoyance without being over-the-top: the rotating stage lending a seemless transition between scenes and a climactic scene involving the re-creation of the Parisian barricades of the Revolution of 1830 topping the list. Notable number: "One Day More."

What do you queens think?

Had I but world enough, and time...

2006-05-09T14:01:00.000-04:00

...I could blog consistently and not be such a wank. (My apologies to Mr. Marvell.)

OK, so I've neglected the blog for far too long. I can try and rationalize it, but I won't. Honestly, all I can say is that I've been busy, and I've been lazy, and the blog has been the last thing on my mind. So, here's an update:

-The conference. It went better than I could have imagined. It was my first academic conference, so I was very nervous about presenting my work to a room full of my peers. But, it turns out that everyone was very excited by my work, they had a ton of questions, and quite a few had some very helpful suggestions. One man, whose work I was actually commenting on in my paper, was in attendance...and instead of berating me for getting his argument completely wrong, he was very impressed with the "improvements" I had made on his thesis and told me to keep up the good work. Huzzah for me, I say.

-The midwest. The conference was my first time farther west than Valley Forge, Pennsylvania, and I have to say that it wasn't quite what I expected. First, everyone had told me it was flat. I didn't expect it to be quite sooooo flat. Seriously, you could see for miles unimpeded. Second, the local citizenry was a lot more diverse than I had expected. Honestly, I expected only to see gaggles of corn-fed white boys (and who doesn't love those?), but there was a dazzling array of colors and cultures. Granted, I was in a college town, but still it was pretty impressive. Third, and last, culture shock! Everyone was very friendly (unlike here in good ol' Puritan Boston), but also slightly right-of-center in their politics (again, unlike good ol' Kennedy-loving Massachusetts). While I was on the quad of the conference University, one of the undergraduate student groups was holding a raffle to win a rifle, and encouraging whomever won to trade it in for store credit so that they could actually get an automatic. *Shudder.*

-Teaching. It's over! I have but to give my final exam, and my first official course will have been completed successfully. I have to say, I ended up learning many things as well as imparting knowledge to a few undergraduates. And not only about history, but also about people and pedagogy.

-Summer plans. Well, I won't be slaving around the office day job all summer like I have for the past couple of years -- I got a summer research fellowship that will allow my to work exclusively on my dissertation without having to worry about how I'm going to feed myself! Sadly, it's not enough to get me to France, but it is enough to get a sizable chunk of my research done and even, perhaps, to start writing a chapter or two! That is, provided I can get my ass in gear and actually be productive. Faced with a summer of ostensibly "free" time, how many people would have the willpower to read 19th-century medical journals rather than spend all day lounging about the beach, the mall, or the couch? Also in the works for the summer are a few friends' weddings, and my second-ever trip to the midwest with Bryan -- to Canada and his lovely home state of Indiana.

-The relationship. It's going very well! Bryan and I aren't ready to kill each other just yet, and we're even talking about moving in together in the fall (despite my repeated claim to not want to discuss it until our 6-monthiversary at the end of May). The prospect is scary, but it's also very exciting! Other than that, we've been carrying on our weekly ritual of American Idol obsession; we've been hanging out with friends (both mine and his -- and even some mixing of the two!); I've been trying to educate him on the glories of some old classic films (we started with Cabaret, and will be working our way through All About Eve, Sunset Boulevard, and The Manchurian Candidate); and he's been absolutely wonderful in teaching me about music, cars, cooking, and just life in general. The poor baby is sick right now, so everyone please wish him well!

So, in brief, life is good. Now let's see if I can get into blogging again for more than a day every few weeks or so...

The Friday Five: Albums of the 1990s

2006-03-17T11:29:00.000-05:00

So I've decided to institute a new weekly posting tradition: the Friday Five, wherein I choose the Top 5 of Whatever Topic I Think Of That Week. Comments, arguments, agreements, and suggestions for future topics are all welcome!

This week: The Top 5 Albums of the 1990s

1. Nirvana - Nevermind: The grunge revolution may have brought about the death of my beloved hair metal, but I'll be damned if it didn't perfectly capture my teenage angst in its incomprehensible lyrics and distorted guitars. Key track: "Smells Like Teen Spirit."
2. Pearl Jam - Ten: Another grunge classic, but unlike Nirvana's emphasis on sound and fast-paced rocking, Pearl Jam's introspective lyrics and takes on contemporary issues like school violence had a lasting impact. Key track: "Jeremy."
3. Madonna - Ray of Light: The Material Girl transforms herself yet again into a maven of spirituality. This album brought techno music into the mainstream by combining techno's emphasis on heavy beats and electronic instrumentation with a raw emotion infusing technology with a soul. Key track: "Frozen."
4. Britney Spears - ...Baby One More Time: Far from musically incisive, this little gem brought about a revolution in pop music by reviving dance-floor-ready, infectious, bubble-gum pop music after the musically angst-ridden days of the mid-90s. Sure, we may have her to blame for endless boy bands, Spears-wannabes, and Kevin Federline but this jewel still makes me wanna shake my proverbial groove thang. Key track: "...Baby One More Time."
5. Lauryn Hill - The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill: She's nuttier than squirrel turds, but this album was brilliant. Urban beats, amazing rap rhymes, and a voice that won't quit. Perfection. Key track: "Everything is Everything."

Thoughts anyone?

Culture Corner: La Grande Odalisque

2006-03-14T18:35:00.000-05:00

Jean-Auguste Ingrès
La Grande Odalisque, 1814

This painting, currently housed at the Louvre in Paris, is another mystery of symbolic representation à la Las Meninas. This time, however, instead of the visual spacing of the piece's main characters, the mystery of La Grande Odalisque resides in the anatomy of the Odalisque herself. If you look closely at the lengthy, sinuous back of the alluring, exotic Odalisque you might notice a strange phenomenon -- notably, that she appears to have far too many vertebrae for an average human female.

Art historians and critics have argued over this apparent "flub" in anatomical representation for ages. Was Ingrès a shoddy hand at anatomical representation? Or is there some deeper meaning in endowing his creation with a longer-than-average backside? In teaching my own course in modern history, I try to fit the piece into the larger Neo-Classical/Romantic movement of the late-eighteenth and early-nineteenth centuries. The Romantics were prone to representing things that would evoke emotion through scenes of vast, majestic landscapes, representations of the dark side of human nature and the occult, and through exploration of the exotic. As such, I argued to my students that the reason for the Odalisque's incorrect anatomy might be to call attention to the old Romantic emphasis on feeling rather than exact representation.

Current explanations would have us look at the broader symbolism of the image by representing a symbolic juxtaposition between the innermost thoughts of the woman and her social role -- something that Ingrès was fond of doing in his other work. For example, if you look at the face of the Odalisque, her expression belies a complex psychological make-up: her expression is aloof, dispassionate, and inscrutable. She is, at base, a mystery. As an Odalisque (a woman retained by a sultan in his personal harem), however, her role is not to think or feel, but rather to exist for bodily pleasure. This theme would be consistent with broader nineteenth-century views on female gender roles -- "public women," i.e., prostitutes, fulfilled a vitally important social role as repositories of male sexual desire. Thus, the larger-than-average pelvis would be a symbolic exaggeration of the "public woman's" social station. The effect of the elongated back, therefore, is to make the pelvis (the symbolic representation of the Odalisque's social station) more prominent and to distance the head (the complex inner psychology of the subject) from her prescribed social role.

Many thanks to Drs. Jean-Yves Maigne, Gilles Chatelier, and Hélène Norlöff for this fascinating new perspective on one of my favorite pieces of art.

Pity Party

2006-03-08T10:44:00.000-05:00

March is typically a bad month for grad students around here because it's time for financial aid applications to be due, it's midterm season for undergrads so there's a mountain of grading to be done, and on top of it all I personally have a conference paper to finish. So, even though this week is technically spring break, I've been working my ass off trying to get all of this hoo-ha done. Believe me, I'd much rather be waxing philosophical (or somethin') on the blog, but instead I have to force my way through towers of undergraduate writing and bite my nails while the graduate committee reviews my financial aid application.

Hopefully by next week I'll be able to take a breather and write something of actual interest. Wish me luck!

Go Paula. No, really...just go.

2006-03-02T15:21:00.000-05:00

Oh, Paula, Paula, Paula. Gone are the heady days of the late 80s and early 90s when you ruled the airwaves with your slightly nasal vocals telling us to "straight up now tell" you that "he's a cold-hearted snake" that you loved because "opposites attract." Like the former Laker girl that you are, you could dance with the best of them -- and we enjoyed watching you crawl all over that neo-industrial ironwork contraption in the "Coldhearted" video as equally as we swooned for you shaking your booty with MC Skat Kat in "Opposites Attract." I have many fond memories of those days. Together, you and I, we made wonderful memories of pre-adolescent sleepovers and semi-formal middle school dances. Among many divas of my youth, you were a star second only to Madonna. But now, we must part ways.

I will admit that occasionally on your recurring gig as the "nice judge" on American Idol you look fabulous. That piece you had on last night was stunning, with your shapely figure fairly busting out of that gold-lamé top and your russet locks falling alluringly over your shoulders. But, as your cohort Simon Cowell often acerbically states, a pretty face does not make up for inadequacy. As a judge you are, in a word, useless.

I only wish that I had as much faith in most of those contestants as you apparently do. You are seemingly inspired by every performance -- bad, good, and in between. And I admire your faith, I do. But it is not doing these kids any good to praise them for mediocrity. Perhaps, in your rose-colored world, sour notes are perfectly acceptable in a pop star. Lord knows we forgave you for quite a few missteps ("Will You Marry Me?" anyone?). But I, for one, am not as forgiving. I can do without screechy renditions of Stevie Wonder songs and hackneyed pop-rock stylings of corn-fed trailer trash. Their mere presence makes the integrity of the competition somewhat circumspect for those few that actually do belong there (hello, Mandisa!).

So, Paula, I beg you. Get some sense. Restore my faith in you and help me regain at least a smidgen of that starry-eyed optimism of the 90s. And bring back that gold-lamé top. Really, it was fierce.

Culture Corner: Las Meninas

2006-03-01T14:37:00.000-05:00

Diego Velázquez, Las Meninas (The Maids of Honor)
1656

This is one of my favorite paintings of all time. It is currently housed in the Museo del Prado in Madrid, and although I have never seen it in person, I fell in love with it the minute I saw a print of it in an old art history text. The more I read about this painting, the more I like it -- it blends style, grace and elegance without the typical Baroque over-the-top flourish. At the same time, the unusual spacial position of the piece's central figures renders it a mystery to those who gaze upon it.

The picture is a portrait of the Infanta Margarita, the Spanish princess. She is surrounded by her maids, a dwarf, and a dog. The man in front of the canvas is Velázquez himself, and the king and queen are seen reflected in the mirror at the rear of the room.

The central focus would appear to be the Infanta, as she is at the center of the painting. She is the smallest of the foreground figures, but she is the focus of the movement nonetheless. Her maids lean and kneel toward her in deference, and her broad shoulder and wide hoop skirt make her the fulcrum of the scene. The dwarf is there for contrast--in comparison to the ugliness of the dwarf, the Infanta appears delicate and graceful.

While the Infanta is the subject of the foreground, the center of the piece is clearly the king and queen reflected in the background. However, this is highly unusual. In most Baroque portraits, the subject of the portrait is shown as the most prominent object of the scene to lend a weight typical to Baroque opulence. In Las Meninas, however, the king and queen are not even "really" in the painting, merely their reflection. The visual suggestion is that the king and queen are somewhere beyond the boundaries of the painting -- in fact, due to the visual spacing of the reflection, they would be in our place, as viewers of the scene. This paradoxical "absent presence" is compounded by the fact that, in the painting, Velázquez's canvas is hidden from our view. Therefore, it can be assumed that we, as viewers, in the position of the king and queen (who are the "real" subjects of both Las Meninas and the canvas being executed in the painting) are truly the subject of the painting. It begs the question: who is the real subject of the painting? What is significant about the fact that we the viewers and the king and queen are representationally occupying the same space?

This piece has been puzzled over by far more brilliant minds than mine: Michel Foucault, Sir Thomas Lawrence, Pablo Picasso, and many others. It is a true testament to the power of the arts to confuse, inspire, and stimulate. Enjoy!

Hello again.

2006-02-28T10:37:00.000-05:00

I'm a terrible, terrible blogger. But I have reasons!

February was an incredibly busy month for me:

-Aside from my normal lecturing/reading/writing/teaching duties, I was asked by the department to sit on a committee of graduate students that would have input as to which candidate to hire for their latest job search. In academia, the job interview process is VERY lengthy, often involving about 2 days worth of meeting faculty and grad students, meeting deans, giving job talks and teaching demonstrations and any other assorted nonsense that the school can dream up. It's exhausting. Now, it was very exciting for me to be on this committee -- it gave me a lot of insight into the job search process, and it gave me departmental experience that I can put on my CV -- but good Lord in butter, it was time consuming. Interviewing, meeting with the committee, compiling reports, going to job talks...sheesh. And what happened in the end? The department didn't pick the candidate that we all wanted. In fact, they picked the ONE candidate that all the grad students agreed the department should NOT hire. C'est la vie.

-I had a birthday! On this past February 14 (yes, Valentine's Day), I turned the ripe old age of 27. I am now in my late-20s. It's just one short stumble into 30 from here. The birthday was delightful, and even doubly delightful because it was the first Valentine's Day that I've enjoyed as such, all thanks to Bryan. On the 14th, he had a "bouquet" of chocolate-covered strawberries delivered to my office, and later that evening he made me dinner at his place -- a variation on the first meal that we had together back in October. *GUSH* On the 15th, birthday/V-Day part II was dinner at The Fireplace in Brookline. Wonderful meal, lovely ambiance, and even lovelier company.

-My roommate also had a birthday this past week, so the two of us had a joint birthday party at our place in Watertown on Saturday night. A motley assortment of people (grad students, high school friends, college friends, relatives, theater nerds, polyamorous pagans, and even a burlesque dancer named Juicy the Clown) gathered for some drunken revelry and cake. Our apartment was destroyed afterward, but the proverbial good time was had by all. Except when Asian Bitch Boyfriend of My Friend C was so sloppy drunk that he was flinging his expensive white wine all over my pants.

-The conference is coming up in April, and my paper has to be distributed to my panel by the end of March. Seeing as I haven't completed the research for said paper, I've been trying to get my ass in gear so that I can impress all of my colleagues with my vast knowledge of Belle Époque French pornography. BONUS: I just found out the chair of my panel is this guy whose work I very much admire, but whose work I also criticized in the article I published last year. Hopefully, he hasn't read it.

-I'll be adopting a cat in the near future! For my birthday, my sister gave me all the supplies I'd need to host a furry new addition to the family, something I've been talking about for the past 6 months or so. On Sunday, we drove all over creation trying to find a place to adopt a cat, only to discover that, apparently, you can't get cats on Sundays in Boston. The hunt continues...

OK kids, back to work. I'm hoping to post more regularly starting from today, because I hate that I'm not posting as often as I would like. So, here's to an optimistic new Blog-aissance.

Two Parties and a Meme

2006-01-30T14:08:00.000-05:00

Well, this weekend was just delightful. Despite being roundly trounced by Karl at Friday night's rummy game, the rest of the weekend turned out to be really great. The QBB gathering on Saturday at Sean's house was a lot of fun. It was great to see some familiar faces (Bryan, Karl, Will, Sean, Keith) and to meet some new ones (Chris, Atari, Jeff & Moe). I'm looking forward to the next one, y'all, and by the way -- a "heisman" is a "direct and impersonal rejection of a sexual overture, pass, or advance." It's based on the Heisman Trophy statue. Man, sometimes straight people are way lame.

Sunday was Chinese New Year, and since Bryan is of Chinese descent, I got dragged into a new holiday celebration. It was actually really great. It was pretty simple, involving mainly a lot of Chinese food dishes (prepared by Bryan!), and some hanging out and general merriment. I also learned something: Traditionally, if the year happens to correspond with your Chinese zodiac symbol, it's supposed to be a bad year for you. So, happy new year of the Dog to you all, except those of you who fall under the sign of the Dog! I hope you make it through the year with all of your limbs in tact. Gang hee fat choy!

OK, as I said before, I love blog memes, so here's one via Chris:
1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the next 3 sentences (#5, 6 & 7) on your blog, along with these instructions.
5. Don't you dare dig for that "cool" or "intellectual" book in your closet! I know you were thinking about it. Just grab what is closest. No cheating.

So, here it is:

"'It's a mania all these women have got. One even went so far as to steal my dog...But is it my fault, my dear, if you drop her?'
"Rose turned around, deathly pale. Sipping her coffee, she gazed hard at Steiner, and all suppressed anger she felt at his abandonment of her flamed out in her eyes."

-Émile Zola, Nana, 1880

Nana is about a Second Empire courtesan and her insatiable drive to enter proper society, thus consuming all men that foolishly fall for her. This particular scene is when a rival courtesan, Rose Mignon, is fuming over the fact that Steiner, a rich banker, has thrown her over for Nana.

To be honest, there were several books within reach. However, the Communist Manifesto doesn't have 123 pages, the book on Romantic art on my desk only has three sentences on page 123, and the early 20th-century gay pornography on my desk (it's for RESEARCH, people!) is in French. So, you get Zola...and that, honestly, is the nearest book that fit all the appropriate restrictions.

Happy Monday!

"'The time has come,' the Walrus said, 'to talk of many things...'"

2006-01-25T15:27:00.000-05:00

OK, Bryan will probably kill me for a couple of things I'm about to reveal, but whatever, it's my blog and I'll post what I want. So, without further ado...

100 Things About JC

1. I was born on Valentine’s Day, 1979.
2. I’m originally from East Hartford, Connecticut.
3. I’m gay.
4. I came out to my friends while I was a Junior in high school.
5. I came out to my family while I was a Freshman in college.
6. I moved to Boston for school, and have been here ever since.
7. I’m currently a graduate student at the same institution I went to for undergrad.
8. I am in a Ph.D. program for European (mostly French) history.
9. I am proficient in French and German besides my native English.
10. To date, I have dated 6 people.
11. I have only had sexual relations with three of them.
12. All but two of the aforementioned paramours lasted less than a month.
13. Although I have never tried either one, I’m seriously turned on by the ideas of voyeurism and exhibitionism.
14. I don’t have a specific “type” of guy to whom I am attracted – my objects of lust range from Colin Farrell, Justin Timberlake, and Orlando Bloom to B.D. Wong, Chris Meloni, and Prince.
15. I work in academia, but I hate doing research.
16. On the other hand, I love teaching.
17. I am a published author.
18. I have a younger sister.
19. She and I are completely opposites in personality, but we get along really well.
20. My parents are still married despite the fact that I don’t know that they have anything in common.
21. I love art and art history, particularly the Baroque and Romantic eras.
22. Ditto for classical music.
23. I feel like I was cheated by my high school for not having to read enough “great literature,” so consequently almost everything I read is a “classic.”
24. Sometimes, I wonder why the book I’m reading is considered a “classic.”
25. I am a big science fiction/fantasy nerd.
26. When I was in middle school, my favorite books were the Lord of the Rings trilogy and the Dragonlance series.
27. I’m addicted to American Idol.
28. Half the reason I like watching it is because I watch it with my boyfriend and we make out during the commercials.
29. Did I mention I have a boyfriend?
30. I think he’s amazing.
31. We’re in love. :-)
32. I make fun of people for being sappily romantic, but deep down, I secretly like romance.
33. I used to play the clarinet.
34. I also used to be a dancer.
35. In dance competitions I was the runner-up to be Teen Mr. Dance of Connecticut.
36. Although I think gay culture is often fabulous, I don’t actually like a lot of gay people because I think they’re shallow.
37. In college, I was a big club kid/circuit boy.
38. Consequently, I now have a lot of useless clothing including shoes with silver flames on them and a black velvet shirt.
39. I am obsessed with Madonna.
40. Weirdly, I’m also obsessed with late-80s and early-90s hair metal.
41. I collect things, even if some of those things hold no personal enjoyment for me. For example, I hate Arnold Schönberg’s music, but I still have CDs of his stuff because I think I need it to have a well-rounded collection.
42. I am prone to exaggeration.
43. I think I’m ugly, and that’s not an exaggeration.
44. I often compensate for the lack of self-esteem by pretending to be fiercely independent and aloof.
45. My favorite painting is Las Meninas by Diego Velázquez.
46. Right now, I’m rockin’ out to Mötley Crüe’s “Kickstart My Heart.”
47. Sometimes, when I’m out, I act like a flamboyant queen to make people think I’m interesting.
48. I live with a loud, opinionated redhead.
49. I love her to death, but sometimes I think we’re too co-dependent.
50. Sometimes it seems like she and my boyfriend are in a cosmic battle for my soul.
51. I love Designing Women and will watch it every chance I get, even though I’ve seen every episode multiple times.
52. I tried the Atkins diet once. I lasted for four days before I got so ill that I broke down and had a muffin.
53. It was the best muffin I have EVER. TASTED.
54. Before this past year, I had not been on a date for almost 6 years.
55. I am a clinical hypochondriac with mild OCD.
56. I have a regimen of therapy and Zoloft to help me deal with it.
57. I used to be addicted to cybersex.
58. I have tried phone sex twice.
59. Both times I ended up laughing hysterically into the phone.
60. I also – once! – had cybersex while naked on my webcam. Please don’t judge me.
61. My first kiss wasn’t until I was 18 years old.
62. I have only ever kissed one girl, and that was because I was drunk.
63. It didn’t turn me on even a little bit.
64. I’m pretty agnostic – apathetic? – about religion, although I admire people who have strong faiths (so long as they don’t force it on other people).
65. When I was a little kid I used to have recurring nightmares about being swallowed by a giant lizard in a desert or being attacked by a snarling wolf-man.
66. I have no idea what that means.
67. I wear mostly boxer-briefs or boxers.
68. I once stole a Playboy magazine from my neighbor’s house.
69. Until recently, I had never 69ed with anyone.
70. I totally planned for that to be #69.
71. I was valedictorian of my high school class.
72. I love gargoyles because I think they’re cute.
73. I first came out to my mother as bisexual to soften the blow.
74. She called me on it.
75. I was in love with my college roommate.
76. He started dating a mutual friend, and now I don’t speak with either one of them.
77. I’ve only been to one other country: France.
78. I desperately want to go back.
79. I’ve met Debbie Gibson, Jasmine Guy, and Greg Louganis.
80. I really love musicals, my favorites being Into the Woods, Sweeney Todd, and Cabaret.
81. I’ve kissed two other bloggers.
82. I know how to read Tarot cards, and frequently consult them.
83. I don’t actually believe they work, but I think it’s interesting how accurate they can be.
84. I love horror movies.
85. I hate haunted houses.
86. When I was in second grade, I vomited in front of the class while giving a book report.
87. When my best friend left for college, I sat on my parents’ front porch and cried for an hour.
88. We’re still best friends, even though she is a hardcore Baptist who thinks homosexuality is a sin.
89. I never knew either of my grandfathers, as both of them died before I was born.
90. In elementary school, every day after school I would walk to my great-grandmother’s house to play cards with her.
91. She died when I was about 10 years old, and I still miss her.
92. I once saw someone get his legs severed by the T on Commonwealth Avenue in Allston.
93. I’m pretty close to both my immediate and extended families.
94. I’m terrified of insects and spiders.
95. I still enjoy camping.
96. With volume controls that are indicated by digits, I have to set the numbers on the evens or on the fives.
97. I didn’t particularly like Brokeback Mountain.
98. I think “open relationships” and “polyamory” are just excuses for being slutty.
99. The only part about exercising that I enjoy is looking at naked guys in the locker room.
100. I’m done!

Clearly, I suck at life.

2006-01-24T10:08:00.000-05:00

OK, I'm a loser of a blogger. I haven't been updating, and really, I have no valid excuse except to say that I'm lazy. Although, that's not entirely accurate either. In fact, I've been quite busy of late. School has started again, so I'm preparing lectures and assignments. I've been doing some cleaning at my apartment and re-organizing my room. I've been filling in for a colleague while he goes on some job interviews. And, of course, there's Bryan, with whom I seem to spend almost every spare moment. So I guess I'm not lazy -- I'm just so busy I don't have a lot of time to blog! It's bizarre...I was blogging almost every day when there was nothing special going on in my life, and now that I actually have some sort of existence I don't blog about it.

Political Thought of the Day: Does anyone else think the Democrats are total wimps? I'm not a Republican, and I almost always vote Democrat down the line. However, these Alito hearings have got me confused. The Democrats on the Senate Judiciary Committee never went in for the kill! When there was an inconsistency in his testimony, they missed it. When he skirted around answering a question, they let it go. Don't these people watch Law & Order? You ALWAYS make the witness look like a fool, especially when they give contradictory answers to direct questions. So basically, all of us liberals are fucked because Ted Kennedy and Chuck Schumer didn't have enough sense to hire some lawyers as consultants. Thanks, guys.

Coming soon: 100 Things About Me! I love blog memes, even though they are corny, and I thought this one was particularly interesting. Can I come up with 100 things to say about myself? We shall see.